Margaret’s Persuasion Coach Blog
April Resolution of the Month: Practice Paraphrasing
What do you do when someone just won’t listen? He says something you disagree with, and no matter how you try to explain another point of view, he keeps reiterating his original idea as if he didn’t even hear what you said. In these cases, paraphrasing his words can...
Consensus Success in a Volunteer Group
I love hearing my clients’ and readers’ success stories, especially when they involve new contexts for application of their consensus, persuasion and communication skills. This week, Gracie of Austin, Texas wrote to me, “While reading Bridges to Consensus, I...
Defense Against the Dark Arts of Persuasion: RELATIVE SANITY
Suppose you go shopping at Southside Mall and see a shirt you like for $55. A passerby tells you, “I saw that same shirt at Northside Mall for “$43.” Northside Mall is a twenty-minute drive from your current location. Would you make the trip to save the $12? If you...
Win-Win Waiters
I love finding new examples of the interested-oriented approach to dealing with others, examples that show how we can get more of what we need or want from others when we address their interests along with our own. A day or so ago, I read an article about new trends...
Communication Resolution of the Month, March 2012
I hope you have all enjoyed your February resolution by a practicing a relaxation exercise at least once a day. For March, we build on the calm and confidence boosting effects of relaxation by adding a practice of gratitude. At least once a day, preferably early in...
Wire Your Brain for Consensus
Back in hunter-gatherer days, our brains evolved what scientists call a “negativity bias.” We are wired to be on the lookout for threats. This wiring can work against us when we are seeking consensus. The good news is that we can change this wiring to serve us better...
Assessing Your Communications
You have an important conversation at work, and that evening, you think of the “perfect” thing you could have said, but didn't. We've all experienced those “Why didn't I say this” and “Why did I say that” moments many times. Those of us with perfectionistic...
Defense Against the Dark Parts of Persuasion: AUTHORITY
Years ago, many of us read about experiments in which research volunteers complied with with the instructions of a lab-coded, clipboard-toting researcher to deliver increasing electrical shocks to a “test subject” whenever that subject answered a question incorrectly....
Consensus Resolution of the Month, February 2012
A daily relaxation exercise promotes successful consensus building, and offers many bonuses for your mental, emotional and physical health. You can do this exercise in just a few minutes, and this small investment in time can pay off in greater productivity and...
Defense Against the Dark Arts of Persuasion, RECIPROCITY, II
In the first post in this series, we looked at the ways that marketers, ideologues, and other “compliance professionals” can manipulate people with the rule of reciprocity. This rule, hardwired into our brains, urges us to accept any gift or favor another person may...