The Positives about Negatives

The Positives about Negatives

As many of you know, I am a great proponent of positive terminology. While we must sometimes view things negatively in order to identify a problem to be solved, I prefer, thereafter, to speak about the positive opposite we wish to gain. For example, instead of “war on...
Persuasion, Dumbledore Style

Persuasion, Dumbledore Style

The Harry Potter character Dumbledore, head of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, can teach us muggles (non-magical folks) a lot about persuasive communication, and we don’t need magic wands or spells to emulate him. We only need to keep our wits about us....
Be the Adult in the Room

Be the Adult in the Room

As I’ve written in Bridges to Consensus, my “Silver Rule of Consensus” is, “Avoid or minimize wrong making.” When we make others wrong, as by directly contradicting or arguing with them, labeling them with negative terms, or the like, they instinctively resist. Many...
How Old Dogs Learn Interpersonal Skills

How Old Dogs Learn Interpersonal Skills

Contrary to popular belief, even mature people who are decidedly bad at the key leadership traits of communication and relationship building can improve dramatically. Two Harvard Business Review bloggers found that executives who were judged worse than 90% of their...
Accidental Noncommunication

Accidental Noncommunication

Your e-mail service or ISP goes down. You forget to charge your phone or tablet. Your computer crashes. You’re speaking to someone on the phone, and she says she can’t understand you; the signal must be weak. You receive a hard mail letter dated a month ago or...
Paintball vs. College

Paintball vs. College

A true story from a friend illustrates four principles of effective interpersonal persuasion. First, less is more. Second, people tend to live up to your sincere confidence in them. Third, a special personal touch can be more persuasive than mere words. Fourth, if...