Margaret’s Persuasion Coach Blog
During my “broken pipe event,” I both witnessed and experienced a dramatic two-part demonstration of how casting someone as wrong can work against you…[I]irresistible instinct or not, wrong-making on steroids lost this mother pretty much any empathy the restaurant staff or the other diners might have had for her.
I had a leaky pipe event (more of a gusher, actually), and believe it or not, the people skills I teach–persuasion, consensus and communication–helped me handle it… I was awakened before 7:00 AM by the smoke detectors, yet I didn’t see or smell any smoke, but rather, water…
Those of you who have followed this blog from its early days, might remember my posting, several years ago, of a real life success story: Consensus Success in a Volunteer Group. Gracie, the lady who shared the story with me, has now reported another success, one in which she helped three children, ranging in age from ten to six years of age, practice consensus building.
You might imagine that, when I teach a 1.5 hour mini-workshop on persuasion, I would cover the most basic element of my persuasion/consensus building system–uncovering and talking about what’s behind the things people say they want, their ultimate interests. But we require more than 1.5 hr. to assimilate that skill…So for a short persuasion workshop, I focus on one of the persuasion skills I personally use most, such as paraphrasing. Trainees can learn enough from a short session to practice paraphrasing on their own.
Fall weather energizes us to do what we’ve been putting off. Our first cool fronts of the Fall blew through last week. In October on the Gulf Coast, “cool” can mean daily highs in the low 80s or upper 70s (as opposed to 90s). But the second front gave us a low in the 50s. A spurt of energy to catch up on things I’ve been putting off arrived with the front.
For talking about touchy topics, complex situations, or emotionally loaded matters, texting is all but hopeless…So you can understand my concern that many young people have grown up texting…However, I recently came across two encouraging reports.
I’m sure no one deliberately sets out to shrink their brain. If anything, most of us want to grow mentally–learn new things, open our minds to different points of view. But did you know that complaining could shrink and rewire your brain, harm your health, and attract more of the very things you complain about into your life?
If you missed the excerpt, “What’s the twist,” from Love on the Rocks with a Twist, or it’s been awhile, you might like to read, or review it. Now, here is an excerpt from the accompanying “Study Notes for What’s the Twist”…”Interests and ‘Walkaway Alternatives”
My book Love on the Rocks with a Twist – Delightful Fiction with Lessons on Dealing with Others begins with an introductory essay, followed by study notes introducing the most basic of the consensus building skills demonstrated by the characters in the remaining stories. Here is an excerpt from that intro, “What’s the Twist”
In previous posts of excerpts from Bridges to Consensus, we’ve seen that The Golden Rule Isn’t Always Enough. And we’ve seen that People Resist Being Wrong. For this reason, I coined what I call “The Silver Rule of Consensus”: Minimize Wrong Making.”… Here’s a fact scenario from Bridges, pp. 35-6: